Being an introvert is as easy as putting a square into a circular hole.

Introverts often get typed cast with negative stereotypes. Also, most people have no idea what an introvert is when attempting to explain your personality type.

But tell them you are an extrovert and a light bulb will go off in their mind because everyone knows what an extrovert is and all of the perceived rewards that come with it such as being known as “outgoing” and “social”.

Even though your introverted tendencies come to you as naturally as blinking does, you can always improve.

Become a better introvert so you can improve the quality of your life. Too many introverts try to become extroverts due to mixed messages from society to be this social butterfly.

Let’s go over some ways to become a better introvert.

To be self-aware is the ultimate form of self-care

Without self-awareness, you are walking in t the dark.

Self-awareness protects you from the world trying to impose its will on you.

Introverts need self-awareness like fish need water. This is because introverts tend to get mislabeled, often confusing them. When the world is allowed to define you instead of you, this leads to a destructive path.

How do you become more self-aware:

• Start writing down your feelings no matter how ridiculous they may seem. Being able to look at your thoughts from a different view allows you to deeply examine yourself.
• Find out what triggers you. Every time you find yourself reacting strongly to the world around you, take time to examine why you feel so strongly.
• Start to challenge your assumptions about what you were taught about yourself. Don’t take everything you were told about yourself at face value. You will find out that some of your assumptions are incorrect.

“When I discover who I am, I’ll be free.” – Ralph Ellison

Embrace the darkness

Introverts are not cuddly and calm beings who do nothing wrong because of their introspection.

In order to accept yourself you must accept the negatives as well.

Introverts have a very loud mind. Inside this loud mind is a word of many negative thoughts. An introvert’s mind is a gift and curse because inside the mind is as real as the oxygen that we can’t see.

Every introvert has the ability from Batman the hero to The Joker the Villian in seconds.

Negative thoughts can take over swiftly.

How to embrace the things that you think are wrong with you:

• Our dark traits can be strengths. Sometimes these traits are the very thing that helped us survive adversity in our lives. An example is cutting of the physical world and living inside our heads in order to deal with reality.
• Pointing out the areas where you can improve gives you something to look forward to. Imagine if you were perfect, life would be extremely boring.
• As Carl Jung states, “Whatever is rejected in yourself will appear in the world as an event“. No matter where you go or how hard you try to bury your darkness, it will always pop up in life as a lesson until you learn to accept it. Make life easier on yourself and live with your demons.

Don’t try to fit in

Fitting in with everyone else is boring.

No matter how hard you try, you will never fit in as an introvert.

Compared to everyone else, introverts can be weird. They are the complete opposite of the majority of society. They relish being alone, are self-sufficient, and have incredible mental resilience.

When you have personality traits that stand out, run towards them, not away.

I have taken the good with the bad regarding my introverted tendencies.

I have repealed the wrong people and attracted the right people in my life.

How to embrace your differences and stop trying to fit in with everyone else:

• Trying to fit in is mentally draining and has a low return on investment. At best, people may like you for attempting to fit in but they will like a fake version of you, and being fake can be soul-crushing to an introvert.
• The world respects authenticity but it comes with a price. If you take a look at people who have made history, they did things in unconventional ways. Everyone wants to be these people but doesn’t have the mental spine to go against the grain. Introverts are naturally able to follow their path.
• Most people’s choices are not their own. With so much influence on us starting at the tender phase of childhood, we are taught what to like and dislike. These influences come from many factors like teachers, parents, school, and the media. Attempting to be like everyone else can be like the blind leading the blind. Not fitting in may save you from this path.

“Fitting in is boring. But it takes you nearly your whole life to work that out.” – Clare Balding

Find passionate hobbies you can enjoy forever

Introverts need to be able to get lost in their inner world through hobbies.

There are benefits of developing hobbies that can be enjoyed alone, such as reading, writing, gardening, or painting, and how these can enhance the quality of life for an introvert.

What is something that you have been doing since you were a child or you lost yourself in?

Everyone else gets their dopamine from world distractions such as social media, drugs, or alcohol. Introverts get their dopamine from their passionate activities. A lot of these activities usually come from creative endeavors.

Personally, for me, my 4 passions that I can do forever are music, dancing, travel, and language learning.

How do you find passionate hobbies that you enjoy or that have nothing to do with your work, family, friends, or personal life:

• A lot of our passions that bring us joy tend to get buried within us as we get older. Life responsibilities and life adversity tend to get in the way of passions. You have to try to remember a time when your imagination was pure and that time would be as a child.
• Now and then you will daydream. Pay attention to where your mind goes. Where your attention goes is where your energy goes. Is there something that you can’t stop thinking about?
• What are activities that you feel like you can do all day? Think about the times when you lost track of time. What are subjects that you can’t stop talking about?

Dedicate specific time for solitude

Allow the mind to roam when alone.

Solitude isn’t the absence of connection but the fulfillment of oneself.

Western culture gets these euphoric highs of having their minds constantly stimulated. If not careful, introverts will become collateral damage in a culture that worships busybodies. This is why introverts must take time for solitude and it must be non-negotiable.

How to prioritize your solitude:

• Make time for your creative hobbies. Most hobbies that introverts have tend to be solo activities which allows them to be inside of their minds.
• Schedule times of the day when you do absolutely nothing. When you have to constantly use your mind, it drains you mentally. Giving your mind a rest from stimulation helps you reset.
• The Western world worships people who are perceivably popular due to their appearance of having a lot of friends. Introverts get guilt-tripped into trying to emulate this behavior and they get burnt out. Learn the power of “NO”.You do not have to accept every social event

Let’s recap on how you can become a better introvert and be comfortable in your skin

• Know yourself from the inside out
• Be comfortable having flaws
• Stop trying to fit in
• Enjoy your weird hobbies
• Plan a time to do absolutely nothing