Struggles by introverts are unique only to those with introverted behaviors.
Introverts have a different set of problems because their way of thinking doesn’t fit the consensus.
When you are a part of the minority in the world, it is like fighting a battle uphill.
But there is hope.
Identify the obstacles and tackle them one by one.
Overcoming the Social Anxiety Boogeyman
Socializing takes mental energy which burns calories from the entire process.
Social anxiety will suck the soul out of an introvert.
This is one of the most challenging struggles by introverts
The difference between introverts and extroverts when it comes to socializing is extroverts don’t think about socializing they just act. Introverts may spend an eternity overthinking every possible scenario that may or may not happen. This is where the social anxiety comes from.
By the time an introvert is done overthinking all of the horrible scenarios in their heads, they are already too exhausted to socialize.
This is the beginning of the social anxiety cycle.
I have a rule for every social situation. If I don’t feel that I am at least 90% mentally, I won’t attend. I am in tune with social perceptions.
Most introverts are like me and sometimes our feelings are worn on our faces. This is the death and cold stare most introverts wear on their faces and get accused of being angry.
I will usually have this stare when I am facing some sort of social anxiety. Understanding how this look may be perceived, I avoid giving off this angry vibe by not attending.
What are some ways you can overcome social anxiety?
- Spend time alone, yes it may seem like an oxymoron but being alone in solitude is where introverts get their energy. The more energy you have, the less anxiety builds up.
- Practice being in uncomfortable situations. Awkward social situations are not going to disappear so the key is to get accustomed to them so the fear loses its power.
- Record yourself talking. Some social anxiety comes from self-judgment from hearing our voices. Getting used to hearing ourselves on camera makes talking in person easier because talking on camera is like public speaking.
Should you go solo or be with people?
No person is meant to be alone.
No matter how much introverts like their introspective alone time, they are not modern-day monks who want to live in a cave. Everyone needs human connections. Introverts’ version looks different from the rest of the world.
Too much of anything can be harmful and this includes having an overactive social life.
“Introverts don’t just form connections, they form soul bonds. And that is why they can’t vibe with everyone. They may look shy, mean, selfish, or uninterested. But trust me, all they are doing is protecting their energy.” – Master_Nobody
How can introverts balance the delicate line between solitude and connection:
- Get rid of feeling shameful for not wanting to go out. It is like feeling guilty for staying at home because you are sick and trying to get healthy.
- Strategically plan when you can put your best social foot forward. The best way to do this is by self-awareness by understanding what drains you throughout the day
- Listen to your intuition. There is a difference between isolation and loneliness. One is a feeling and the other is a mental health issue.
Being the observer, use your listening superpower to communicate
It is challenging being silent and standing out in a loud extroverted world.
Introverts can use their natural ability of deep listening to understand and engage with people around them.
Introverts get misunderstood for not listening due to being active listeners.
This is the life of an introvert. When introverts listen, they take on an observational approach and this approach gets confused with disinterest. Few take the time to listen because everyone is fighting for attention.
This is why listening is a superpower for introverts.
How to properly use the art of listening:
- Use the power of observation by reading body language, listening to tonality, and reading facial expressions.
- Use the power of introspection by giving others a different perspective.
- Use the power of deep conversations to understand. It is difficult to understand another when discussing shallow conversations.
Dealing with the perception of being anti-social
The more people you are around, the less you know yourself.
It is for introverts to spend time alone, recharge, and engage in activities they enjoy to survive in an extroverted world.
Introverts get burnt out from too much mental stimulation. This comes in many forms but the common culprit is too much socializing. Unfortunately, socializing is a huge part of day-to-day life.
What are other ways introverts get burnt out:
- Long periods of socializing without any mental breaks.
- Surviving the day from obligations such as family, friends, and work. After that, attempting to do something for yourself leaves you drained.
- Pretending to be extroverted for job purposes. When we have bills to pay, we get stuck at jobs that go into our weaknesses.
Why is it crucial for introverts to take care of themselves:
- Introverts spend most of their days trying to fit in an extroverted world. There is only so much energy a person has before they start operating on empty.
- Introverts’ minds turn to mush when they are overstimulated. Stimulation is at its worst when it comes to people. Constantly having people project themselves onto you every day while having to decipher whose feeling you are feeling, theirs or yours?
Extroversion is an enormously appealing personality style, but we’ve turned it into an oppressive standard to which most of us feel we must conform ― Susan Cain, Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking
Managing stress and burnout in high-stress environments
Introverts are often considered some of the kindest people you will meet until they are stressed.
It seems just about everything stresses out introverts. There are mental stimuli, life pressures, or family obligations everywhere you turn. It is like running around in a maze and everything is a dead end.
Even with the calm exterior introverts present, there is a war going on inside their heads.
Everyone has to wake up and go to jobs they hate just to bills. This culture wreaks havoc on an introvert’s mental state.
For years I went from job to job ever since I was a teenager until I found jobs that I tolerated. I soon discovered that these jobs were high-stress environments.
Like everyone else, I had my reasons why I went to work until I kept quitting these jobs.
Quitting was my way of managing my stress but I would not recommend it
How you can manage your stress and burnout in high-stress situations:
- Make breaks non-negotiable, take mental breaks when necessary, or even excuse yourself. Leaving is a lot better than a meltdown.
- Temporarily escape reality, listen to music, and watch your favorite Netflix show to allow your mind to rest before you enter reality again.
- Don’t judge yourself. Sometimes you have to allow yourself to fumble your way through stress and figure it out as you go. You learn to become compassionate with yourself and bit build resilience
Let’s do a run-down on the struggles by introverts:
- Social anxiety
- Social balance
- Using observation as a communication tool
- Dealing with the “anti-social” label
- High-stress environments